dear to whom it may concern,
it’s been nearly a year since my last letter. i didn’t mean for such a long absence to occur and yet it has anyway. nevertheless, my thoughts and hearts bring me back here again. bring me back here to you.
i may be stating things and feelings i have already shared and if so, i apologize. it’s just that certain things always remains and haunts me even if sometimes i do not see it or feel it.
like dreams. a few nights ago i had a series of dreams i have had before and i don’t know why a residue of emotions lingers from it. nothing really special seems to appear from it and it might actually be a little droll in repeating the details of it. yet it lingers. yet there is something definitely there that i can feel inside of me. is it the house? is it who i might be in the dreams? is it the time, the location, what, what, what?!
maybe it’s the longing. the longing of understanding truly who i am and others understanding and accepting of it as well. will there ever be any one on this whole wide earth that can truly understand? i know you do God, i know that is the point of being the Higher Being but the puzzles remain. i am a daughter of light with curiousities and eccentrics. that is me. I believe in Him, am saved by Him, but i am still different. is that okay? these dreams, i question and i only wish there were true answers for? and about the companionship? i don’t think that want i desire inside is even truly possible in the world of the living. it just doesn’t seem that way. the feeling lends itself to a more, well, for lack of a better word, a dream.
so you see why i have come back because there is so no where else that i could explicitly lay down the words to be read other than here.
never changing, always changing,
ada



